Today, I’d like to talk about vulnerability. For most of my life I protected myself quite well from being hurt or getting hurt. It meant not letting people in all the way. Pretending I was ok, when I wasn’t.
Two years ago, after I went through a time of personal healing, I realized something. By keeping others out, I was boxing myself in. I contained my heart and my emotions in a box and put a tight blue ribbon around it. By subduing the negative and painful feelings, I also subdued the joy and love in my life.
It takes trust to let others in. It means to not be in control of what happens at all times.
Through my journey as a nomad I had to learn to embrace and love uncertainty. Traveling to new places, having to adjust and handle what life throws at you is refreshing, but also scary at the beginning. I learned to let go of the expectation to always be in control and I just followed the flow.
On my journey, I met people with hearts wide open and I connected to those the most. They inspired me to open up my heart and let love in. Much deeper than ever before. They taught me that being vulnerable is a beautiful thing.
I’m nowadays pretty much an open book to my close friends –I call them my soul friends. I follow my intuition in deciding when and who to open up to and I haven’t been disappointed yet.
Next month I’ll be speaking at a big conference about one of my vulnerabilities. It will be in front of a big audience and it feels scary. I finally finished my talk transcript this morning and I feel a little more at ease. But for the past 2 months, I’ve been haunted by anxiety and overwhelming feelings that are hard to describe. Letting yourself be vulnerable is a big step. On a stage like that, it is definitely out of my comfort zone. But I feel courageous and I hope I will encourage others to embrace vulnerability too.
Wish me luck!
If you want to learn more about the power of vulnerability watch this Ted talk by Brené Brown.